Today I found an old journal entry that I wrote on November of 2013. After reading it I started pondering and realized that my life was very different a few years ago. To understand this I would have to tell you a little bit about my history with Mormonism. On May of 2013 I became a Mormon, I got baptized and everything. I started studying online on BYU Idaho and I also made a lot of new friends. Everything was going good and I started to visualize myself spending a whole like on that religion. None of my family members became Mormons so I was kind of alone on that journey, it didn’t matter a lot to me because they supported my decision and I got a lot of friends and good leadership inside my ward.
Long story short, after almost three years of being the best possible Mormon, new information was delivered to me and I got a Mormon faith crisis that made me quit this religion for good. I quit Mormonism on April of 2016. To be honest I was a very, very good Mormon, I tried my best and I did everything in my power to fulfill my “mission” on earth, but this information was very powerful and I could not continue with this lie, Mormonism stopped being true for me. It’s a pretty long and interesting story, maybe one day I will make a video about this, maybe not.
This is what I wrote on that Journal Entry:
Young Single Adults Conference Taxco, Guerrero Mexico 2013
This journal entry is about an experience gained in a trip made from October 31st to November 2nd. I just aboard the bus on our way back to Cuautla my home town. We barely made it out before the rain. I want to acknowledge that I learned a lot about decisions, and how can we miss important opportunities if we don´t act quickly. I have mixed feelings about this trip, at first I wanted to come without a doubt then my enthusiasm began to lower, to the point that I didn’t want to come to this Conference. My apathy was very big towards this activity and I was looking for any excuses not to come. I had an appointment with the doctor the same day the conference began -that was my excuse- but then I remember that I have to participate in all activities, and I took the decision to come mainly because the Bishop told us that because we have already registered the ward´s budget was going to pay for our places anyways. I don´t like to have debts with anybody and I sure don´t want to have debts with God.
I began the day by finishing to prepare all the things needed for the trip. I took the bus to Mexico City got off in Acoxpa and walked to the Hospital, I got and there were no vitals. I waited for my turn, I talked with the doctor about a lot of things, and I told him that since we last saw each other I took a very important decisions in my life. I became a member of the Church of Latter-Day Saints. I asked if I could go on a mission and he said that there were no contradictions. I began my journey to Taxco I arrived at 5:00 pm and saw that the rest of my Stake was already there. We checked in the Hotel it was a hard time traveling with all the suit cases to the hotel because it was up hill. As I am writing this my mind is flowing and all the words come to my head without many efforts. My line of thought is very quick and I feel great, I feel I warm feeling in my body. In the night we went for a walk with musicians in some of the most important streets in Taxco. It was a little difficult because there were a lot of hills. I made a lot of exercise in this trip, we walked a lot and we danced a lot, it was a lot of fun. After that we went to have dinner and then listen to a talk given by Elder Mirón. The main point of his talk was that for us to become better leaders we had to be prepared academically and not only spiritually. After his talk I learned that there are no coincidence in life and we only have to take advantage of the opportunities presented to us. Karaoke night was due, and there were like four karaoke’s in all the Hotel. I didn’t sing.
We began the day early in the morning by having breakfast. Then we had our workshops. I took four workshops, Family History, Studies a Commandment from the Prophet, How to take care of the money and having A Balance in your Life. After that we did the usual: we ate, and then went to a museum where we saw all the family trees of everyone that participated. Family History is very important. Some cultural activities followed but the acoustic was very bad and the audio was awful. We prepared for the most important part of the weekend (at least for the ones that like to dance a lot). Again I had a lot of Apathy of this activity and I didn’t want to participate because I am not very good at dancing. I swallowed my pride and my apathy and I prepared myself to go to the dance. To my surprise it was a lot of fun! There was a live band and they were cheering all the young single adults. We danced and we danced, even to the point of being very tired and hot. I danced with a girl, she has a beautiful smile and beautiful hair. We even danced a romantic song she was a little shy, so was I. I dance with another girl and had a great time, one of my favorite parts of that dance was when they put on the Daft Punk Helmets, which was very cool! I returned to the Hotel Room and put on my pajamas, I was relaxing and waiting for my roommates while listening to music. I was so relaxed that I could sense a spirit or a presence in the room. I didn’t know what it was but I am sure that it was not evil. My roommates arrived and we went to bed almost at 4:00 am in the morning.
When I woke up I felt very tired and with lack of sleep. I went to the bathroom and resume my resting. After I had rested enough I took a shower and felt like new. We went to have breakfast and then I finished to arrange my things so that I could check out of the room quickly. We went to another talk now with President Kush and Sister Kush the Missions Presidents for Mexico Cuernavaca Mission. The cultural activities resumed and we were able to hear all the presentations better. There was a closure of the conference and some YSA bear their testimony, it was a nice experience. We had lunch and then took the bus to Cuautla.
This was my journal experience I am happy to be part of the Church and to be able to have the opportunity to participate in kind of events.
I remember that when I wrote this journal my mind was working very fast, the words were flowing easily in my head, I was writing with small effort, maybe it was the Spirit… just kidding. Reading this makes me a little nostalgic, I miss some elements of the church, but I do not look back, I’m sure that I made a good decision, I’m happier now and I was able to reconnect with Gris, she is the love of my life. A lot has changed, but in some ways I am the same person, when I find a project that I like I make a commitment and I give my best. Steem is my current project and I will make my best effort to become successful here.